Rosemary Means Remembrance
Rosemary, I feel you slipping away
Pray ,do not desert me.This solitude
Is terrifying .And to confront each moment,
I ask only,that you continue to haunt me.
You are the dead rose whose smell,
Though faint, is never lost.The
Withered ,yet , enduring petal that
Faithfully lies ,between two yellow,
Frayed, pages filled with memories.
Unfazed are you by the inconstancy
Of fading ink , the words that slowly
You watch die,You continue to echo.
For your stain is etched more permanently.
And it tells of a love that you symbolized
And surely ,he once felt for me.
Something I wrote on the spur of the moment. Feel free to tell me if you think it's crappy.
Wednesday, March 30, 2005
Rosemary Means Remembrance
Sunday, March 20, 2005
Has anyone had occasion to read Somerset Maugham's "Catalina" ??
The reason I ask is that , I have to submit a book review on it by the end of the week ,and although I have read the book before and am currently re-reading it , I find that I am in need of some sort of perspective on the more serious aspects of the book.
In particular, the arguments and the attitude the author portrays about a)The spanish inquisition and religious fervour in general b)the undercurrent of cynicism in the entire story(which i don't remember from before) c)The hypocrisy of the clergy
d)anything else you might have noticed that is special( or not )about the book...
I did enjoy the book very much the first time I read it (which was a couple of years ago) . But now as I re-read it , my ideas about it seem to have changed a lot and I find myself a lot more critical about the writing , narrative style and the story line itself. Therefore , since no one I know (or whose opinion I care to ask for ) has read the book , was wondering if anyone who happens to read this might care to tell me some of the impressions that the book left on you , either positive or negative....
Considering , that this book is one of the lesser known books of Somerset maugham (and I think it's his last)...atleast everyone I know seems to blink when i mention it...I'd be great if anyone could give me some suggestions perhaps..'Cos I can't seem to decide what to focus on...and the assignment has to be 3000 words...So..lol..Can't (and ofcourse don't want to) bullshit..
So , If any one can help...I'd be eternally grateful..
Monday, March 14, 2005
This post is not about the movie "BLue streak" or Martin Lawrence ,maybe if it was it might be slightly more entertaining but it is instead, a rather long winded account of my birthday..and a couple of things that happened before and after that pleasantly uneventful day that simply felt the need to recount on my blog!!(This was written on the 12th but I did’nt have time to put it up since exams were on..)
My Birthday was great!! Actually it was pretty ordinary as birthdays go ,in terms of presents from parents and stuff but this time I guess, maybe, I was a little more appreciative of everything..and grateful ..So, Muchos Gracias to everyone who made it special …You know who you are..and you better be reading this…except you atticus…you can just go hang…
This is what I wrote that day :
By popular demand (read vinod's "Me want new post, and soon!! " comment) I'm (obliged to be) back!!
The last couple of weeks have been madness. Looking back now, it seems very hazy. But ,I suppose if you don't work consistently there are bound to be times when all the work in the world lands up on your table to be finished in the last 3 hours , 3 days or 3 weeks...all of which, is probably absolutely insufficient to get the job done as well as you can possibly do it!!
So, we compromise on quality of work! I usually end each day with a healthy ,"F*** it!!! , I can't do anything now anyway" So, my CA Tests (internals, mid-sems or whatever the hell you want to call it) just got over. And the 3 hours of sleep that I managed to steal on each of those 4 consecutive days is something that I find I am incapable of surviving on. So yeah , although the sleep deprivation should have taken it's toll on me...Yesterday was simply great!! (Today, however, is a different story..)
Let me start at the very beginning:
At 12:00 , the morning of the 11th of march , I was awakened by calls from friends with their birthday wishes and demands for treats etc. etc. .These were words that were spoken with much affection and good will between 12:00 and 12:30 and the very words that I had no recollection of at 2:30 in the morning when Vishnu (he’s nocturnal and therefore my official waker-upper during exam times ) called me for the second time to wake me up to study for my solid state exam (which I had’nt yet begun then , and eventually did’nt begin at all!) which happened with such perfect timing , to be exactly 20 yrs past the day I was born!!!!Yay me!!!!(Bah!! my birthday has always been bang in the middle of exams!)
It's 6:45 AM : I’ve just discovered that I’m still in bed and have been since about 3:15 when I gave up studying with the F*** it!! ( as aforementioned )and crawled back into bed despite vishnu’s entreaties to “drink coffee and get moving.”
7:45 AM : I’ve reached college and my three best buddies began a loud and very rousing rendition of ‘happy birthday ‘ ,(The first of 4 that day! !) thus disturbing all last minute muggers (lol…not as in the thugs that stick you up and that haunt the dark alleys of NYC…but just as annoying) who had to contain their irritation at being disturbed because they couldn’t possibly tell us to shut up…meghs and gayatri would fix them with a glittering eye..lol..
7:50 AM : After wrestling among themselves and their consciences they decide to give up and just give me the presents before the exam , even if as they put it “ it causes me to be overwhelmed with emotion and choke on it and therefore do miserably on my test” (Ah! ! my friends…Your concern…lol..but the thing is it was pre-ordained that I do miserably anyway , you see , that happens when you do not engage in an activity called ‘studying’! !)
So , I am handed three presents ,and I try to guess what they are before opening the wrapping despite gayatri’s insistence that I should’nt “feel up” the gifts.. Anyway , so I got a book…that was a great present…anyone who knows me would probably find it easy to shop for me…I’d settle very happily for a good book. (Vishnu , this is for you…take the hint…especially since you are rich now!!)…
And next was a stuffed doll…Now this mystifies me , ‘cos my friends know that I’m not one of those typical girls that go ga-ga over a stuffed toy…but hey! the doll was actually very cute and it was shall we say , “capable of calisthenics” ! ! ! So , no looking at that gift horse in the mouth… …lol Lastly , was something that I found really special ….A bottle of blue hair mascara ..Umm..yes…you just read that right…I did say I liked it and in the same breath also mentioned it was BLUE! ! !
See, I’ll give you a short summary as to why it’s so special
-Have always wanted to streak hair blue…
-Never had the courage to ask parents
-Finally asked them a week before birthday
-They made lots of noises but after much consideration said yes ..(Wait to go , mom and dad! ! Very cool of you to actually agree to suffer being in public with a blue haired offspring!)
-Thought it was gonna cost me 1500 bucks , but turns out my hair is too black and stuff has to be done to it if the blue has to show
-The stuff plus streaking blue comes to a nice round sum of 4 grand. (yes..Indian rupees ..current exchange rate 43.84 for a dollar)
-Me being conscientitious about amount of shopping already done , felt obligated to decline despite parents’ grudging acceptance to shell out…
-Was very disappointed
-Consoled self with a promise to indulge in whims costing 4000 grand the minute I begin working (Which could be a long way off…)
Therefore , for all above mentioned reasons , junta around me figured I was sort of disappointed (despite best efforts at the stiff upper lip) So , they decided they would get me the next best thing : Temporary blue in a bottle…I was thrilled..
Am currently sporting short hair that is streaked blue (Although considering my natural colour is jet black it’s a bit hard to see…sort of looks like veronica lodge style blue) and you know what…it is’nt ghastly and the proof of that is my friends and especially my parents have’nt disowned me! ! !
I must admit, however , that I shocked the daylights out of the faculty and staff at college..I got lots of "Whaaaaat Maaa.....Why did you have to do this ..." And then open-mouthed stares followed by "Oh my god...Your hair is blue.." (Duh!!!!Can't you see!!)and many many others like it...but then that was half the fun anyway…(Oh , if anyone knows of anyone else with streaked blue hair in chennai don’t tell me…I’d like to think I’m the only one…)
Umm…back to my birthday..Daytime was usual, went to lunch with parents…had to study for the next day’s exam(nuclear phys) and did’nt end up doing too much of that..was too excited ..about what..I don’t know..but I was just so thrilled…
Anyway , so all my friends called from out of town , even the crazy ones who are too busy being IITians (bah! ! !..ok..ok am not complaining da..you called at least! !..lol...) and then finally we went out for dinner.
Dinner was ,in one word: Fabulous.
The Crown at Residency Towers, has the most beautiful view of madras ever and it is so god damn romantic! ! ! It’s unbelievable! Unfortunately no special someone to speak of . (Damn! !) However, I am immensely grateful to parents for suggesting to treat my 5 friends there…
Dinner itself was great…everyone loved the food. My friends got the singer in the lobby to sing happy birthday for me while we were waiting to arrive and they sang along(that was second time) and then they surprised me with a cake (which I think in residency is complimentary) and sang another happy birthday (the fourth time…...they already sang once when we got seated at our table…I think everyone at the restaurant between 7:30 and 10:00 knew it was my birthday..lol! !) at the top of their voices..Was exceedingly sweet of them although I was a trifle ,no!! actually very, embarrassed. But the place was so beautiful
Suggestion to all single guys trying to pattao a girl: Take her for dinner there...She'll be convinced in a hurry!!!!
The ambience was awesome..and the lighting perfect..It could not have been more beautiful...Ofcourse we had to hang on to everything ,Literally!!!! Including napkins because the wind was a bit strong...lol.
As I was driving back home , was thinking what a great day it had been and all that…despite exams (Thanks you guys for coming despite everything…especially you meghs…) and then thought how I had got such nice presents and all and when I finally got back home just as I was going to bed parents called me to give me last present of the day…(They had already given me quite some stuff before) A cellphone! !
Now if you’re thinking that it’s not big deal…you’re absolutely right…It is no big deal and I’m probably the only person in chennai as of march 10th who did’nt have a cellphone , not like I particularly minded but dad is very very very anti-cellphone…So considering that , it was a really big deal…So that just made my day…More because it was symbolic of them giving me my space and freedom than because of the actual object itself.
All in all it was really great…Oh and to my silly brother…Where’s my birthday present????? Your deigning to come back for the hols (As though you have a choice!!) will not pass of as a present and in any case is not good enough!!!!!!!!
P.S: Was sitting in gangotri today with friends and happened to remark that they had sung Happy Birthday four times that day and suddenly atticus jumps up and says…Hey…I don’t like the no. 4…What say we make it five…So gayatri and meghna and atticus launch into another rendition of happy birthday…3 days post facto…Ah well..It’s good to feel loved…but I have a sneaky suspicion that they were trying to see if Gangotri would give us anything complimentary ….As If! ! !